Balance

I haven't written here in a while. Mostly because I haven't had time, and partly because I forget. I want to change that though. So here's my first post in a long time.

Balance, I struggle to find it. I am a stay at home mom, so I should be able to do it all right? It's such a struggle for me to juggle housework, cooking healthy meals, laundry, my husband, and spending time with my kids. Plus my photography hobby.
Lately I've been really struggling with it-then I came across this blog Passionate Homemaking (simply because I was doing a google search for homemade tomato soup-it amazes me how God works!) and it spoke to my heart. So, I've been praying a simple prayer for several days now, it's simply "Lord change my heart". It's not profound, it's not long, but it's from my heart. And guess what, He is. No my house isn't spotless, but my moments of frustration are fewer, the time I spend with my kids is sweeter, the irritation at my husband isn't so frequent, God is changing my heart.

I am so thankful His mercies are new every morning.

A rant, a rave, it's a bit of an opinion piece.

*Disclaimer* This is my opinion only. If you disagree that is fine, I have no problem with that.



This past week I was sick, so in sick person fashion I watched the TLC show "Toddlers and Tiaras". Can I just say. Oh. My. Word. I mean seriously. I wanted to jump through the screen and shake those mothers. It made me so angry.
Why is that when grown men in sports take steroids, they make the papers and lose reputation, but when little girls are spray tanned, given false teeth, put on diets at 6, and taught to parade across a stage in "beauty" pageants we applaud them?
Then there is the money that is spent on them. In one pageant alone, the cost was $1225 (This included a $700 dress for a 5 year old (?!) a mani and pedi, hair, makeup, etc). The highest amount of money this little 5 year old could have won-$500. Oh and her mom decided to not allow her to get a spray tan because she didn't believe 5 year old should be sprayed tanned. Then once at the pageant she was told that in order for her daughter to even have a chance at winning she would have to be spray tanned. So she did.
The moms kept saying about how much of a good experience this was for their daughter, how it builds self esteem. Self worth. I would like to ask them in what way? How does this teach them to be kind, loving, selfless, gracious, thankful, and having an inner beauty?
At what point in History did we decide "Oh let's little girls dress up like little women and call it a sport"?
I realize that the Toddlers and Tiaras focus on the "Glitz" pageants and that there are natural pageants, but still,  it upsets me. Why make a little girl worried about what she looks like at 4 and 5? Let her be a girl. Let her be a child. Let her be natural. For some girls, that means tutus and ballet, for other girls that will mean jeans and sports, and for other girls that will mean a combination of all that. It doesn't mean enduring spray tans, hours of makeup, and hair pieces, oh and can't forget the false teeth!
In the world we live in today children are faced very early on with adult decision. Why rush it? Why not let kids be kids. Trusting, carefree, and not worried about whether or not the little girl next to you is going to win because she happens to be slightly tanner then you.

A Pregnant Ladies Song.

This must be sung to the tune of "My Favorite things" from the "Sound of Music".

Hemmerhoids and hair where it shouldn't be growing
Peeing on myself and not even knowing!
Climbing the stairs like I'm one hundred and three
These are the things that are happening to me!

Sounds that I thought could never come from me!
Skin tags and craving everything that I see
My bladder happens to be the size of a pea
These are the things that are happening to me!

Heartburn and varicose veins happen all the time
Belly button that's gone and it's getting harder to rhyme
My ankles are the same size all the way up to my knee
These are the things that are happening to me!

When I'm grouchy! When I'm impatient!
When I'm feeling blah!
I simply remember it's only nine months!
And then I don't feel so bad!!

Random thoughts about my trip to triage.

I spent about 4 hours in triage last night. My ultrasound tech was a perky 13 year old-well she looked that old who used the word "bummers" and "panties". And she couldn't tell me anything. Then went outside my door and announced what she found to all of the nurses and midwives. Loudly.

My nurse was convinced the pain I am having is coming from the baby kicking me. So now when baby starts kicking, I have that song stuck in my head "Kung Foo Fighting".

I don't understand why people like Vicodin. I thought for some reason that my arms and head weren't attached anymore. That they were on balloon strings tied to my body. I also thought my nose was the funniest thing ever. Then I started crying. And then I just felt drugged.

My husband told me we're not going back to triage until my water breaks. So if you read a post about how I had my baby in a bathtub while my two kids played in their rooms, you know why.

A book review-Softly and Tenderly

I recently had the opportunity to read the book "Softly and Tenderly" by Sara Evans. Like most Christian novels I have read, I expected to be able to tell how it was going to end after reading the first chapter. I was pleasantly surprised that this was not the case.
I found the book interesting and easy to read. It was realistic and not overly preachy. The undertones are defintly  Christian.
If you have an afternoon, grab some tissues and enjoy this book!

Back in my day...

Recently I have been feeling a little nostalgic, remembering back when I was a kid. See when I was a kid (which I will say wasn't that long ago!) We didn't tweet, we didn't have Facebook, we didn't have cell phones, and until I was a teenager, we didn't even have a computer. And yet, we survived.

In this world where books and privacy are quickly becoming obsolete,  I wish for those days. Back when if I wanted to know what was going on with one of my friends, I made a phone call or wrote a letter.  I had to make more of an effort then just checking out their Facebook page, or sending a quick text. I miss that.

Remember when "going steady" was the term? Now it's "Facebook official". Remember when following a celebrity meant reading about them-and writing them the occasional fan letter? Now, you can follow their every move through Twitter and keep up with their latest works on Facebook. Remember the smell of a new book? Or even an old one? The way it felt to turn the pages, to feel the paper in your fingers. The joy of walking into a bookstore and realizing that there were so many options? Now all you have to do is turn on your Ipad, Kindle, or Nook and within minutes download several book titles. With a swish of your index finger the pages turn. Where is the joy in that?

Remember when bullying took place in person? Where it was limited to just the people around-and not the entire world. When you did something embarrassing, only the people who saw it happen would talk about it. There was no digital copy and no YouTube. Where the people you called friends, were just that-they were your friends. People you had taken the face time to cultivate a relationship with.

Technology does have it's advantages, but sometimes it moves at such a fast pace that it leaves me breathless. I can't-or rather I don't want to keep up. While I enjoy technology-I enjoy being able to see what's going on in the lives of my friends, I just wish for more then just a comment on a photo.

More Dear Letters

Dear Baby in my Uterus,
I love you. I do. But could you please, please be awake when I am awake? And not decide to have a party in there at 10:00 p.m. every night? Or, aim your kicks to a place where I am less likely to feel them. Say..the placenta!

Signed an exhausted mommy,
Anna

Dear Winter,
I love the first snow. But don't you think it's time to take a break? I would like to be able to go out without having to layer up my two children. Who by the way, hate coats.

Signed if I see another snow I may cry,
Anna

Dear Ben and Jerry,
You are evil.

Signed my hips love you,
Anna

Dear Person who says condoms are 99% effective.
You are wrong. That is all.

Signed a very much pregnant woman,
Anna

Dear Braxton Hicks,
Please, please, please cut it out. I don't like you, and neither does the baby in my uterus. In fact anytime you come around baby goes crazy. You're squishing my squishy. And for the record, you are not the painless contractions that What to Expect makes you out to be. In fact you're painful. And why must you visit me for hours on end? Go find someone else to bother.

Signed if I have to spend another day laying down I'm going to go crazy,
Anna

Dear Bladder,
I am thankful you are probably nowhere near your original spot. Because while many of the women around me complain of pregnancy causing you to feel full all the time, I rarely feel you. So I have to ask, where are you? Somewhere around my lungs? But I will ask you to please stop leaking when I sneeze. It's rather embarrassing when I have more accidents then my 22 month old.

Signed a little confused and somewhat damp,
Anna